We’re at it again, folks! Team Fortress 2, on the Sawmill KOTH map. Will’s the sniper, with his dapper hat, and I’ve got the pyro again, with his goofy hat. This time I’m bringing Will along for the ride. God help us all.
Bud: "Just me, rebounding rockets. Didn’t hit a damned thing, but I kept your ass alive."
Will: "And then I shot him, and everyone else with him. How did you ‘rebound rockets?’"
Bud: "Pyros do that. They do that to me allot as a soldier, actually. I suck at soldiering."
Will: "I know that."
Bud: "And here you get shot at by a soldier who doesn’t suck at solidering."
Bud: "Ouch, dude."
Will: "Wait – you were supposed to be protecting me. Where the hell were you at?"
Bud: "Somewhere else. Alive."
Will: "See, here’s where I got smart and started kicking ass."
Bud: "Back to the ol’ reliable I see."
Will: "Yeah. You’ve got to be smart."
Bud: "Or carry a big-ass gun."
Will: "Or both."
Bud: "I went undercover for a short because the damned enemy had turrets that needed sapped. I then stabbed everybody in the back and it was a good day."
Will: "So you’re a backstabber."
Bud: "And proud of it."
Bud: "Not this proud though. The damned game swapped my team after the round! I’m blue now, and you’re still red."
Will: "Yeah, it was all bad for you, Bud."
Bud: "I’m getting the jump on you here. Literally."
Will: "Why didn’t I see you here?"
Bud: "I was an allied scout to your eyes."
Will: "Oh, yeah, I thought that was funny, the scout jumping out in front of me."
Bud: "I, uh… I mistimed my backstab."
Will: "I can see that."
Will: "I can see that I killed you too."
Bud: "Not very sporting of you."
Will: "Well you deserved it."
Bud: "That sucked."
Will: "I know."
Bud: "Oh, this was awesome."
Will: "Why, what happened here?"
Bud: "You don’t see me…"
Will: "That’s cheating Bud."
Will: "Man, that’s some bull shit. You were right there and I didn’t see you??"
Bud: "Can you see me now?"
Will: "Why did you stab me in the back?!"
Bud: "Your back was exposed! You had it turned to me."
Will: "What did you want me to do, run backwards and get shot by someone else?"
Bud: "Your choice, dude."
Bud: "And I’m hiding again."
Will: "Where, by the window? What are doing up there?"
Bud: "Waiting on you. You came through the door below, I exited the upstairs door to the outside, followed you in, and then…"
Bud: "… yeah."
Will: "That’s when we teamed up again and won, of course."
Bud: "Yus, but that doesn’t make for good reading."
Will: "No, no it doesn’t."